taelle: (tea)
I am inattentive: I did finish the first chapter of War and Peace, and many others - I just confused first chapter with first part, which I have yet to finish. And as at 16 or wherever I last read it, I still feel sorry for Vera. Oh yes, I do identify with her a bit, but still. An older daughter in a large family - probably the oldest child, as far as I can see - and an obviously unloved one, a younger - four years younger - sister preferred. It looks to me as if Vera seeks to be approved, noticed and praised for a thing she's temperamentally suited to - for being responsible, correct and polite. Which, of course, doesn't work. And she's a bit nasty to Sonya, of course, but also correct - the nice and kind Rostov family _would_ put an end to Sonya's love for Nikolai; Vera's just the only one who says so at once. (I feel sorry for Sonya too - I have this strange urge to either marry her to Denisov or to make her a Jurisfiction agent)

This, of course, is what I identify with - being a calm and reserved and quiet person with not much of a... social intuition in a family of charming and expansive and temperamental people. Also, it looks to me like Tolstoy does not trust calm and polite people. And keeps comparing women to animals. He's a great writer, but not a very pleasant person.

In other news, got back to getting massages, which I stopped when I fell ill. That was nice, though my back feels sort of surprised.  Tried to catch up with work in view of approaching deadline. Since I am not yet up to speed with work, I can't properly make plans for the weekend, which annoys me. I guess I'd better think that I'll be working till Monday - this way the only surprises I'm getting will be pleasant ones.

Wrote again, another silly drabble - crossover and possibly AU and most certainly not for posting, but yay me for writing three days straight and for not being afraid to write silly random ideas.

Artsy me

Oct. 3rd, 2011 03:41 am
taelle: (tea)
Today I have been listening to music.

I don't do it that often, actually. I did listen to music a lot as a teenager. And in my twenties I even slept with my radio turned on, music 24 hours a day except for news (I started doing less of it once I started dreaming of Bill Clinton et al. Nowadays I most often listen to music as I walk, and that's mostly 'walking' music, one with a pleasing rhythm. Well, and there's also musicals, but I sort of treat them separately, more as theatre perhaps.

Nevertheless, I've been listening to Brian Crain - I saw a video on YouTube and thought I had to have more of that. Nothing special, perhaps - new-agey piano music, but he has an album called A Change of Seasons and apparently it was just what I needed at this time of the year and life.


Also, I went back to listening to Patrick Allitt's lectures on Victorian Britain, and today I listened to the ones about arts and science (I spent a lot of time in public transport today). And I kept thinking how fandom-type people tend to like pre-raphaelites a lot - and I don't. Then I thought that I don't really know them well enough to dislike them (there was a quote by, I keep thinking, C.S. Lewis that I can't find any more, which went something like 'You can (say you) like classics without knowing much about them, but if you say you dislike them, you need to have good arguments for that'). And I don't really dislike them - I just... am not particularly fond of them. At this stage I like other things more - like really-realistic scenes capturing moments of life. I started liking portraits a lot - I didn't use to like them... Ah, uneducated me. The more I read (or listen to), the more I realize how much I don't know.

About my plan for writing in October - I did write today! About 300 words at best, I think (I was writing by hand), and it's a perfectly useless ficlet, but I need practice, and I need to fall back into the habit of writing. So - go me (and the tag to remind myself of it. I think I need some more/other writing tags, but I'll have to think about it some more).

* * *

May. 4th, 2010 02:36 am
taelle: (tea)
So I've been reading discussions about modesty, and acknowledging your own awesomeness (like here), and the comment threads with people listing their awesomenesses (yes, I know it's not a word), and I thought "Oh, I don't even have anything to list"...

And then I paused and thought about what I'm doing here. Like, on DW and on LJ. And realized something I forgot.

Hey, you know what? I can write pretty well in a language not my own. I can use idioms, play with language, that sort of thing. It took me a lot of practice to be able to do that. Can you imagine how many books in English I'd read to get a decent wordhoard? (not that was a hardship, mind)

And more than that, I can do more than blog and have conversations online in English (with people often not realizing I'm not a native speaker). I can write pretty decent stories in English. Stories that people have read thinking not 'Damn, this foreigner can make grammatically correct sentences in English' (which wouldn't always be true, btw - Past Perfect is not my friend) but 'Damn, this person can tell a story'.

Am I awesome or what?

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