Aug. 1st, 2014

* * *

Aug. 1st, 2014 02:38 pm
taelle: (sad)
I am always wary about claiming a national identity. I never claim to be Jewish - I used to introduce myself as 'fake-Jewish', - I never felt comfortable with 'Russian' as a nationality, I feel it's more of a ... citizenship (damn, I lack words, in English nationality seems to be a bit of a different thing); then again, I am uncomfortable stating I love this country (see, saying 'this country' is considered to be an insult for too many people), it's just mine.

I was thinking about various emigration possibilities and some of them apparently involve claiming other national identities. I sort of feel it to be cheating. Not 'cheating on my country with this other one' but cheating as in stating something which is not true in order to reach my goals.

I am not sure I feel Russian, but I am not sure I am anything. Well, not on that level. I do feel loyalty and attachment to places, and to sociocultural groups (I am becoming more and more attached to identifying myself as part of intelligentsia as it is once again becoming something to deride). But nations are too big and too alien.

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taelle

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